My Blog

I’m a year older. A year over the age of 30.

I wonder why some people make a big deal out of it. They start getting scared of whatever it is that scares them once they step on the ladder of the 30somethings.

I don’t feel different. Not yet… at least. But I hope this year i’ll be more wiser. Only thing I hope and wish for every year. Aside from good health not just for me, but also for my family and friends.

I will celebrate my birthday quietly. Well, a quiet shopping day (Peter’s gift to me) and a dinner in a Thai restaurant with Peter and 2 of our closest and dearest friends. I hope it will be quiet though, if Peter doesn’t complain from the shopping hehehe.

Anyway, so far, being 31 doesn’t seem to hurt at all. But let’s see… perhaps when i’m 31 years and 2 days older.

As I was driving back home with Peter next to me… my mind just drifted into the food that I’m so looking forward to eating when I arrive in the Manila.

I first thought of Mango flavoured ice cream from Magnolia, Ube Macapuno and Melon. It’s been awhile since I’ve had it. But each time I leave for Manila I always try to remind myself that I shouldn’t forget to eat the ice cream. Which I never seem to remember, as I have other things in mind which I want to eat first like Fish ball… yes fish ball. The ones from the street ha!

Anyway, as I’m about to leave for Manila in March I just made a mental list again of the things I shouldn’t forget to eat once i’m there. Hopefully this time I won’t forget the ice cream. As much as I never forget to have the Sago drink. Yum!

A couple of months ago I received a phone call from someone inviting me to attend a job fair. I wasn’t really looking forward to it, especially after realizing that I had to drive all the way to a city I didn’t know about an hours drive away from home (that’s 2 hours Philippine standards hehehe). Distance wasn’t at all the main issue but the environment that I wasn’t familiar with. Ok I can speak and understand Dutch but I didn’t know what was in it for me.

Anyhow, I still went. Drove all the way, passed some shops and bought a new tea set hehehe couldn’t help myself. But later on found the place where the job fair was.

Unfortunately, I only found one company that was of interest to me. It was a Belgian company that manufactured and exported furnitures, decorative items, etc. But beautiful items. Very special.

Started talking to the owner, he was nice. Did the usual interview. Looked at my CV. Asked me more questions bla bla bla.

In the end, he told me I was overqualified!!! Should I be happy with what I hear? No, people don’t just say you’re overqualified if you’re not. They would say "I’m sorry but we need someone who speaks fluent French or Dutch." But being told I’m overqualified was horrible to hear! I couldn’t believe my ears. And I certainly wasn’t happy with what I was hearing. He explained to me that he believes I can do better and that I would be bored if I would work with his small company and just be stuck in the office. Ok, that’s one way of putting it.

Up to this day, obviously… I still can’t get over it. Now, how do I make myself less qualified? I think it’s terrible… idiotic.

My dad had the same problems with a lot of companies telling him that he’s overqualified. Which is true. I think he is, but I’ve never thought of myself as the same. Have I been selling myself short? Yes. But… what if you want to compromise your position, what you’re capable of, your education, etc… for the chance of finding a job closer to home. Is that so bad?

I don’t know. I’m still trying to figure it out.

First headache.. Asian Spirit plane from Cebu to Cagayan. NEVER AGAIN!! Scary plane! They shouldn’t be permitted to fly at all!!! Anywhere!!

Left Cebu with FRAGILE stickers on my luggage because of the samples I bought from the Trade Fair in Cebu. Arrived in Cagayan and waited for my luggage to come out and saw that my maleta was all the way at the bottom with all the bigger luggages on top of it! Idiots! Haven’t they heard of the word FRAGILE at all?!! Made a complaint with another idiot who just asked me if anything was broken. Told him that I want him with me when I open my luggage to check and he better pray that nothing was broken. Luckily there was none. But told him that that  was beside the point. When there’s a fragile written on a luggage that means that they have to take extra care. That doesn’t mean that you can throw it and that it should be put at the bottom of all the luggages. Incompetent fools!

My 2nd headache…

Peter always disagreed with me being too easy in giving tips to people who don’t deserve it. I always justify myself of course. Either because I feel sorry or that they do deserve having a tip. But late November this year, I went back to Manila for a 9 day business trip. Went to Cebu and Cagayan and came back to Manila in a matter of 2 days. Wouldn’t want to do it again. I felt like I was there but wasn’t really there.

Anyway, on the day that I flew back to Manila from Cagayan. I took a cab going to my cousins condo in Makati. The cab driver was about my height, thinner than I am, wearing a dark shades but there was no more sun! But ok, I won’t convict him for that. But I was already pissed when he didn’t get out of the cab to take my luggage to put it in the trunk. Then he took the longer way from the airport to Makati. Fine. So we arrived in front  of the condo. The meter showed 105Php. Wasn’t that bad. I looked for money but only had 500Php bills and some change. So I asked the driver if he had a change for 500. Took the money from my hand and handed me 300Php back! So I waited and he intended to get 200 from me. So I asked him… "Baket kulang?" Gave me another 50 peso. Told him it still wasn’t enough. Then gave me another 20 peso. I got pissed then. I told him, if I wanted to give him a tip that’s my decision not his. And asked to take the 20 back and give me 50 peso instead and i’ll give him the rest. He started complaining but gave me the 50 peso. Luckily the security from the front desk came out to help me with the luggage, I think that’s when he decided to give me the rest. After, I gave him the 5 peso. Now we’re even. I told him that I would have given him a tip if he didn’t push it. He told me that even if I gave him a peso he still won’t take it. Shouted back at him that even for a peso tip won’t suit him for his service. So he didn’t get anything from me. So I have proven Peter wrong again. I do take care of my money. I do know who deserves a tip or not. Sometimes, all they have to do is smile and wait.

On the 3rd one…

After arriving at the condo I was turn in between going to church or eating and shopping. Went for the last 2 with my cousin Joy2. Went to Glorietta. Went inside Bayo and didn’t realize until then that I was wearing an entire Kamiseta dress with a matching bolero also from Kamiseta. It shouldn’t matter right? But apparently the sales ladies from Bayo did!! They started staring at me and saying somethings. I didn’t hear it well enough but I knew they were pertaining to me. Luckily Joy2 was standing next to them without them realizing we were together. I asked Joy to confirm. And I spoke to another sales lady to ask who were the 3 ones until the supervisor came out and I complained. Luckily she recognizes me from buying every year in the same shop. So she calls the manager and made the complaint that I shouldn’t be treated like that, especially not for wearing Kamiseta clothes! So they apologized and thanked me for telling them and made sure it won’t happen again. I DIDN’T BUY ANYTHING THERE AT ALL! Went to Kamiseta and bought tops there instead. AGAIN! Really annoying. And you’d think they were there to judge people on what they’re wearing. They were there to serve and nothing more! This is mean… but this I hope that those 3 women got fired. They won’t do that shop any good except ruin they’re reputation.

So all in all… it was a bitter sweet trip. Until the next trip!!

Peter and I had dinner with his colleagues and everybody came with their significant other. It was great. Conversations were light, nothing heavy or dramatic. They toasted for our wedding and the other girl for being pregnant. All in all it was a great night.

We had conversations of countries we’ve travelled and talked about what they saw, what we saw or experienced, etc.

One of Peter’s colleagues has a partner who’s an avid diver. And he’s been to the different islands in the Philippines to dive. He loved the country and the people. But what amazed me was how I reacted to what he said which was normal on the other hand.

This guy was talking about his trip there and his experience of going to small villages and seeing how simple people lived and that they still use the stone to wash and clean their clothes.

My reaction was… "You shuldn’t feel sorry for them. Because they are happy and contented with what they have." And I meant it. I sincerely believe that these people do.

I stand corrected but I sincerely believe that. I think living a simple life makes everything less complicated. Although, neither am I a hypocrite and say that I don’t enjoy a luxury life. But I am contented with what I have.

I am still amazed after more than a year of being on Friendster. I still end up having surprises like getting a message from a really good friend from High School whom I haven’t seen nor spoken with in the longest time. I didn’t even know where she was or what she’s been doing. I just had no clue.

But a month ago or so I received a message saying that she’s been trying to look for me and viola!! And since then we’ve been trying to update each other.

Anyway, I just had this split second kind of thought about the people that I’ve known through this years, what we’ve been through, what we were like before and what we’ve achieved but still remain friends despite the distance and the abscence of each other. All these (by the way) was when I was chopping some bananas for the ginataan I was making so I can bring it to my moms tomorrow.

I don’t know why. And I can assure you that friendships and bananas don’t make any relevance at all to what i’m about to talk about.. well yes the friendships… but not the bananas.

I guess what i’m just trying to say is that I appreciate the friendship, the love, the times we spent and wasted together, the laughter and the tears, the secrets, the moments when words weren’t necessary, the simple hug or a tap on the shoulder… all those little moments. To my friends… I just want to let you know that I remembered you all this afternoon… while I was slicing the bananas. But it was a thought that made me miss you guys so much!!!

Thank you for sharing your lives with me. For being a part of my life. I hope that our friendships will last a lifetime.

Big kiss!!!

Peter and I spent the Christmas eve at my parents. Together with my brother and his soon to be wife Baby and my sister Eileen. Of course my younger brothers Axel and Yvan were there.

It was an evening full of laughter, and some vomitting includid but we all had a great time.

The food of course was amazing, as it always is. One of the reasons why we always love coming home to mom’s. That’s one of the great things about having a great cook for a mother. Aside from the fact that we always get a "doggy-bag" when we leave. And we end up eating the same food for the next couple or so days.

Christmas should be spent with family. Good food, champagne, good wine, whisky, tequila or whatever it is that you have at home. But it’s the presence of family and the exchanging of gifts, the hugs, the kisses, the laughter, the picture taking that never seem to end, makes it more memorable than any normal day. Even if we do all these things on a regular basis.

I remember Yvan asking me every 5 minutes what was inside the box that I got him. I kept on telling him he has to wait until midnight. 5 minutes after, he asks me the same question. Of course, I gave in after an hour of pestering from him. I never learn my lessons. So he knew what he got even before opening his presents. Why did I give in? Because he kept on pulling me every chance he gets and I felt harassed hehehe kidding.

This is the 2nd Christmas that I wasn’t sick. And I thank God for that.

2 Christmases ago, I spent it inside the hospital after a serious surgery and that really sucks. I ended up crying  because I really wanted to be at home inspite of the pain. And my mom ended up calling me every 10 minutes just to make me feel better. Especially that I had anxiety attack and was pissing off the nurses who spoke nothing but French!!! I’m good at that, I mean pissing them off and vice versa. I just wanted to be out of that place. And believe me, never again. I guess if it ever does happen, I’ll wait until New Year is finished.

Anyhow, Christmas was great!! And I hope you guys had the same!!!

I just realized last week how close we are to the wedding day. And yet there’s so much to do!!! I have a couple of weeks of vacation so I can try and finish those silly things that I still have to finalize. Yes, like sending the invitations. But I just never had the time!

Anyway, I gave my dad and mom their invitations and my sister started opening it and read "Bocaray instead of Boracay". And I thought, God please I hope she’s kidding!!

We paid so much money just to have those bloody invitations made and then voila!! A stupid typo just has to ruin it. Well, I don’t care anymore i’m send it anyway i’ll just have to make sure that’s there’s no Island in the Philippines named Bocaray. hehehe

Honestly, I checked the exchange of emails I had with the print shop and apparently they already made a mistake on the first sample they gave me. OF COURSE I DIDN’T SEE IT THEN. Oh well… like i said i’ll still be happy even if the wedding’s not that perfect.

What pisses me off even more is how difficult they make it in the Philippines for foreign couples (i.e. me and Peter) to get married. Luckily we have Tita Lala to thank. Just to lessen the burden.

So far i’m still in the packing part of the wedding. And Peter doesn’t dare help me out since he’s scared of being bitten off. hehehe to those who don’t know how to do that yet, just ask me. When they start being interested in what you’re doing… just show them your claws and teeth.

Maybe i’ll start panicking and have a break down on the day of the wedding you’ll never know. As long as I don’t end up in the 6o’clock News then that’s fine!

It’s been awhile since I last visited my family who lived in the French speaking part of Belgium. Completely the opposite of where I live now. Phone calls just isn’t enough to bridge the gap compared to being able to hug, laugh and annoy my younger brothers.

Last weekend Peter and I went there to have dinner with them and stayed overnight (Yvan’s request) so we can all go together to watch the karting race. Yvan (the whole family calls him Baban instead), asked me to sleep next to him and share his bed with him. He made space and we tried it together if we will be able to fit on a single bed. He suggested that Peter can sleep alone in my old room.

Axel and Baban has updated me about girls and school, etc. I was very surprised to see how much they’ve grown and even their voices have changed so much!! My baby brothers no longer babies. I miss the nights when they would silently walk in my bedroom and whisper to me if they can sleep with me but not tell mommy. Of course I always said yes. And my mom telling me the following day not to let them again next time… course it happened again and again.

I enjoyed our conversations. The games and the dancing we do just before sleeping. Baban and I still danced. Axel on the other hand was showing me his Aikido moves… which I don’t like especially if it hurts me.

Anyway, I ended up not sleeping in Baban’s bed. But I felt really guilty when I checked him in his room and he was already sleeping but he made a space in his bed expecting me to be there when he wakes up. He was really on the edge of the bed. I layed down next to him and hugged him for awhile, torn between sleeping there next to him or being there and not be comfortable at all and end up not sleeping. So I went back next to Peter and woke up really early the following day and creeped back in Baban’s bed. And he gave me a hug and woke up. Asked me what time I went to bed. I hope nobody tells him that I didn’t.

I have missed them so much and we didn’t have to say the words "I missed you". The constant hugs, the dancing, the grabbing my hand and taking me away to sit and talk was more than enough. To me the words mean nothing if the action speaks the opposite.

Am I capable of letting go and let be bygones be bygones? In some cases yes.

I have always believed in the saying "An eye for an aye, a tooth for a tooth". And I have always lived up to that, being careful of what you think and say of other people. Judging them not on their appearance or status in life, but on how they present their views over a cup of coffee. Maybe then you have a better picture to make a  conclusion of their personality. And I expect other people to do the same towards me. Of course that is always not the case.

Recently, a person judged me by the color of my skin and my country of origin among all the other personal insults she threw at me. Calling the Philippines a country of prostitution and nothing else. It pissed me off. And I demanded for an apology, but I wanted revenge. Legally I had every right to sue her, for racial discrimination, moral damages, pyschological and emotional damages, defamation etc… I could go on and on. That’s how angry and upset I was.

I have never been discriminated in all my life. I grew up in such an environment that everybody’s the same needless of their race. What matters most is what’s in your heart and mind.

And I have always been proud of being a Filipino. There would even be instances that I was asked of my nationality and I immediately say Filipino and then give my National ID Card and they’d be surprised that I’m a Belgian. But that’s me and my mind thinking it. As I always say to my friends, I am a Belgian only in paper, but in my mind and heart I have and always will be a Filipino, I just happen to have the benefits of a Belgian.

Good enough I never stoop down on that woman’s level. Because I felt sorry for her, knowing that those actions she did was of mere jealousy. That she only wanted to desroy our (Peter and I) relationship because she couldn’t have her own way. Poor her buhuhu

Some people will just do anything, unfortunately all she did was make her look stupid. Silly really, but all her actions were legally damaging towards her. I’m so happy she did all that, because I then realized that I am then again, a better person than her.

I have always been known to fight back if I knew I had every right to do so. I am a Dragon and a Bull, and it always shows. That’s something I can’t undo, I was born like that. But just knowing your righs and your reasons for arguing and fighting back is very important. I don’t start a fight, I never did but I retaliate when I’m attacked for no reason.

But that doesn’t mean I have given up on filing a lawsuit against her. You see… "An eye for an eye…." that hasn’t changed in me.

So in all that, am I capable of letting go and let bygones be bygones? No, I don’t think so and forgiveness comes in time, after a sincere apology and only when the person means it. But my first priority is Peter and our relationship, all the rest, can be dealt by the Police, the lawyer and the judge. And oh, her boss in that school.